WWW.ALMIGHTYRAY.COM

I mean, we all already know that vampires are awesome. This has already been proven HERE.

Need more proof? Well OK then, how about the fact that the new movie ‘Twilight’, which is based around the world of teenage vampires, of course it makes sense*, has the NUMBER ONE ALBUM IN ALL THE LAND for the soundtrack.

See? Vampires move product! Let’s see the new Wolfman movie do that!!!

-Ray

*OK seriously how does that make sense? I would think that if you were a vampire and were planning on living for eternity, the last thing you would want to do is go back to high school. And even less go back and deal with high school chicks and their immense load of bullshit. I mean, adult women are irrational enough, but teenagers? Wow, I’d rather walk out into the sun. Best plan if you are a vampire who looks like a teenager? Go back and date the high school teachers! I mean, they crave the underage wee-wee already and this way it’d totally be legal cause you’d actually be an older man! That my friends is a win win!

If you google the words ‘Penis Heater’, a posted sketch in the forums of this website is the first thing that pops up.

Now granted it’s in a restricted forum relating to that great show, ‘Pop Co’, and you probably won’t be able to read it, but it’s just nice to know that Google is looking out for me.

Huzzah to Google!!!

-Ray

>rent a car bulgaria nothing like a 15 hour Hollywood day.

Woke up at 10AM and immediately finished up on the extra stuff I needed to get done for the show that I directed today, named Pop Co. I would love to add that I was up til 4AM last night finishing other stuff I had to do for the show. Getting 6 hours, better than I was expecting!

Anyways, got to rehearsal at 11AM, and one of my actors could not be there for FINAL TECH rehearsal. This, as you might know, blows. However, since I am Almighty Ray I had a back up plan of course and had the amazing and talented George Caleodis stand in for my missing cast member.

That went smoothly, and we got done early at 1:40! Cool! This left me a little extra time to get ready for Big News Show rehearsal at 2PM! This is good cause I did not have much time to look over much of anything for this show, and I love that show. Rehearsal went alright for Big News, slightly pulled back cause I had not had anything to eat, so I was a little extra silly I suppose.

So then I got out at 6:30, and made my way home via subway.

Did a load of laundry. Found out that my first load failed to wash 25 minutes into it, and had to start it that much later, causing mild stress.

Got back to the theatre at 8:30. I used valet parking and they jut left my car right there in the red zone next to the theatre. This perplexed me, so my attack level was reduced by one. If you get that joke then you are OK in my book.

Got inside and took some time to go over my one big scene from Big News with the lovely and talented Kipleigh Brown. We played Todd and Sarah Palin, and while the overall show might have been a bit sloppy from what I hear, I felt that our sketch together went just fine.

Did Big News from 9-10, I was apparently happier with the show than many other people. But then again I am seriously easy to please, as long as you do not suck.

Big News over, I had one hour til Pop Co went up. It was at this moment post Big News that it struck me; I did not know most of my lines for Pop Co. With all the time that I spent worrying about the minutia of the show, I had not actually taken an appropriate length of time to learn my lines. So I spent the next hour crushing them in hopes that a last minute jam would stick.

At this point I got a call. One of my actors for the show at 11PM would not make the call time. he has to stop home to pick up a jacket, and will be there ASAP. This causes my already pale skin to turn 3 shades whiter. Also I found out that one of my other actors, whom I love, is palling around in the bar instead of helping us get ready. Oi. Herding cats.

My missing actor shows up pissed off with 10 minutes to go before the show starts. I have to do my best to play Dad to both him and his wife, and get us all ready to kick ass. I still do not believe that I know my lines 100% but have fullest confidence that I can ‘Fucking make it work’.

The show starts. In the opening scene we drop a whole half page of dialogue. I wrote the sketch. It was probably my fault. Nobody noticed. Fuck, OK, let’s keep going!

From there everything goes relatively smoothly. We had someone dropping off a video for the show and they did not get there til 5 minutes after it was supposed to go on. Thankfully, I am Almighty Ray and I had a backup plan and another video ready to go. We ended up showing the missing video at the end of the show, post bows, why not?!?! We finished with an extra 5 minutes to spare, so let’s do it!

All in all I was super happy with Pop Co. For a show that was on it’s deathbed 2 months ago we have resurrected it and made it into something good. For the 4th show in a row we have upped our box office numbers, so we will not be canceled yet. It’s almost like I know something about this stuff? Maybe a little? I hope to never look back and keep this train a’moving forward til the dying end.

A note to all the people who could come and support Pop Co but have not yet; There is still time. I’m not prepared to tell all of you to go F yourselves. But we are building something really fun here, and if you want in on the ground floor, there is space on the bus. But don’t be surprised when we roar out of the station and leave your sorry selves behind. I have put my nuts on the line to make this show worth something, and I’ll be damned if we fail.

This is my personal guarantee; If you come support the show and hate it, I will buy you a drink. I am convinced that nobody but the most hateful will take me up on this. And there is still room on the bus from the most hateful too.

So come and see Big News, cause it is the best show in LA by the way, and come and support Pop Co, cause every single week we are putting on truly amazing shows for you, the ever growing audience.

Somewhere this got off topic as to my day, and became a forum as to why you should love Pop Co. This is OK, cause you should love Pop Co.

I’m just sayin’ come and support the show, I am personally trying to build something great here, and need each and every one of you to help make this show awesome. And I thank every person who has supported us thus far, and promise that the future will be even better.

-Ray

I just saw a report that said that the Iraq Government was ‘Too corrupt and divided’ to be trusted to run Iraq without our control. Wait a sec, too corrupt and divided for OUR corrupt and divided government to loosen the grip on?

Wow, that’s like getting kicked out of Motley Crue for doing too many drugs.

-Ray

Aw geez, once again I got that gibbering jackass Skip Bayless on my TV spouting crap.

He is throwing his support towards taking the World Series and playing it at a neutral site.

This is stemming from the horrible weather in Philly this past year. Game 5 had to be stopped due to awful rain and resumed 2 days later.

Is that seriously the answer? Let look at the ratings for a sec; People did not care about Tampa Bay VS. Philadelphia. If they held the World Series in, say, Arizona, would people there suddenly care? Taking the Super Bowl to a neutral site makes sense. It’s a circus whose main attraction is one 3 and a half hour show. The World Series could potentially last over 7 games! I find it hard to believe that a city will support 2 teams that they don’t care about for that long a period of time.

On top of that why would you want to take the World Series away from the fans of the teams that made it? Those are the people inclined to care (And spend) the most! Yes, some fans would be likely to try and make it out to an event at a neutral site, but there is something very special about having the World Series played in your town.

If they really want to avoid bad weather games, they should mandate that all teams play in domes. If they are not willing to do that then they should move all the teams to warm weather cities. If they are not willing to do that then they should just deal with their own creation and keep on keepin on a sport that has trancended the centuries.

-Ray

PS. Skip Bayless just said that he hates bad weather football games, so maybe we have some common ground yet.

Thankfully I have not caught this virulent disease yet.

Anyways, why is the McCain campaign clinging to this LA Times video story? Why are they calling the LA Times the Obama ‘Pet newspaper’? If the LA Times was so pro Obama then why would they have printed this story in the first place?

And also, I predicted a long time ago that the weekend before this election that we would ‘announce’ that we have caught Osama Bin Laden. I figure he’s been holed up in a CIA condo for some time now, and it’s finally time for the GOP to throw the hail mary by telling everyone that they finally caught him.

And thank God we have a gay marriage vote on the ballot AGAIN here in California. If you were to listen to the ads out here you would think that we were voting on whether or not Gay marriage should be taught in schools, not what the proposition is actually about. That, to be nice, is shameful.

But at least I get to vote yes on prop 5, which lessens penalties on people caught with the weed. And I don’t even use the stuff! I just think enough is enough, let’s just legalize that crap for cripes sake! If we truly live in a free country, then the wacky tobacky should be legal.

Oh yeah, and I still have not decided who I am going to vote for. But do not mistake me, this is not a choice between Obama and McCain. Oh no my friends, this is a choice between Obama and whoever the Communist party candidate is. As far as I am concerned, after the last 8 years, McCain is not even an option. The notion of a Sarah Palin White House should put the fear of God in people like nothing before.

Ok, those be my current thoughts, go vote next week! I mean, unless you plan on voting moron, errrr, I mean McCain.

-Ray

I mean, sure, I’ve already done so much in this life already.

But let me share with you my proudest achievement yet so far;

Over 6 years ago I went over to my friend David’s house for a night of gaming joy. Somewhere in this night I wound up getting roped into a game of Dungeons and Dragons. I was given a premade character in a premade scenario, and just followed along with everyone else for a few hours. It lent itself to an evening of fun…

…Only to discover years later that I am now officially listed forever as a playtester for Dungeons and Dragons.

And you thought I was cool before! Suck on that one bitches!

-Ray

So, I was looking at the polls for all the college football teams in the country, and I came across the following listing;

92. WASHINGTON (0-7)
THE BUZZ: The season is going bad – really bad. Up next? A trip to play USC. NEXT: Saturday, at USC.
93. AKRON (4-4)
THE BUZZ: The Zips will have had a 17-day layoff before they play their next game. NEXT: Nov. 5, vs. Toledo.

Seriously? So a team that has lost every game that they have played this year is ranked ahead of a team that has won 4 games???

Let me also add that there were 120 teams in this ranking. And Washington was ranked number 92, that means that they were ranked ahead of 28 others!!!

How brutal are these pollsters where they would put a team that has failed every single week and never won a single game ahead of 28 other teams, almost all of whom have had a moment of victory?

This is just further proof that polls are a bunch of crap.

-Ray

Oh dang it, if only this one could have been about cock just like all the other Republican scandals! :sigh:

Ted Stevens Guilty

I was watching WWE programming, as I am wont to do, and I saw a series of segments promoting a new character; Kizarny.

Let me get this straight, he’s a freaky looking guy with a carnival gimmick who can only speak in shitty Snoop Dogg parody speech? How would he say ‘Off the hizzle fo shizzle’? Izoff thize Hizzizle fizo shizzizle?

Um, yeah, unless something drastic changes soon this guy is not going to get over.

Err, excuse me, thizis gizuy izis nizot gizoing tizo gizet ovizer.

-Ray

ps. Get it? He’s a Carney, but due to his speech problem, his name becomes KIZARNY!!! HA HA HA that WWE creative team, so freaking clever.